There has been a massive surge in gun purchases ever since Kamala Harris suffered her devastating defeat in November. According to the Philadelphia Inquirer, hordes of gay people are becoming first-time gun owners. They’re planning to resist when President Donald Trump comes to throw them all into concentration camps.
Good grief! Someone should tell them that the Village People will be performing at the inauguration.
The Liberal Gun Club is a nationwide organization that’s very similar to the National Rifle Association. (They’re both gay and no one wants to donate money to them any longer. Ka-ching!)
The Gun Club says it has seen a massive surge in requests for firearms training since Donald Trump won the election. A huge percentage of those requests are coming from members of the LGBTQIA+LMNOPAirForce crowd.
Other hilarious liberal gun groups like the Socialist Rifle Association and the Pink Pistols are also reporting a large surge in requests for gun training. The slogan of the Pink Pistols is “Armed Gays Don’t Get Bashed.”
“We’re not looking to arm up and storm the Capitol,” lisped New Jersey resident Matthew Thompson. “We just don’t want to be put in concentration camps.”
Doug, a grown man who uses “they/them” pronouns, says he bought an AR-15 and took a class on how to use it. He’s worried that the incoming Trump administration is going to restrict the rights of “gender-nonspecific individuals” from buying guns. On the bright side, at least liberals are suddenly understanding how all of us feel when someone like Joe Biden or Barack Obama enters the White House.
Arming themselves with pink and rainbow firearms is not the only preemptive action that “the community” is taking before Trump’s inauguration. A gay bar in Philadelphia called the Club Car is urging all gay people to get married before January 20th.
Okay, they might actually have a point about that one.
As a reminder, the majority of Americans have always rejected the concept of “gay marriage.” Not even California—a state so liberal that it can’t keep water in its fire hydrants—was ever able to pass gay marriage via the ballot box. The last time that California attempted to legalize gay marriage was in 2008 when the voters rejected it by a 52% majority. In California. Every Democrat who ran for president in 2008, including the gay one and Hillary Clinton, opposed same-sex marriage.
Even as the voters rejected gay marriage again and again in state after state, they still offered a compassionate compromise to “the community.” We offered to let them have civil unions for tax and estate planning purposes. That would have been fair. We even let them have a gay president for eight years.
In 2015, a liberal-majority version of the Supreme Court discovered a previously hidden “right” to gay marriage in the Constitution. We had somehow all missed it for more than 200 years.
You’d have thought that “the community” would have celebrated in joy at their 5-4 victory over democracy. But no. Liberals are never interested in “compromise” or “bipartisanship,” which is a lesson that we all, along with Republican lawmakers, would learn. The second that you give liberals a millimeter, they take 10,000 nautical miles.
The moment that the Supreme Court handed down its gay marriage decision just ten years ago, the Democrat Party immediately launched World War T on America.
Unless we immediately started letting men in prom dresses dance for little kids at the library and rub their testicles on them, we were all BIGOTS. The snowball continued from there, to the point where hospitals are making millions of dollars by performing ghoulish mutilation surgeries on children.
(Wow, this article got dark in a hurry, didn’t it? We don’t have another Village People joke to transition back from that.)
Our point is that “the community” probably does have a point about gay marriage. If a case ends up in front of the newly 6-3 conservative majority Supreme Court, they’ll probably take a more honest look at the issue and overturn it. Don’t worry, gay people. We’ll likely still let you have civil unions.
We’ll also let you keep the AR-15s. Maybe you’ll stop voting for politicians who want to take our guns away now that the shoe is on the other foot.
